‘Expect to have hope rekindled. Expect your prayers to be answered in wondrous ways. The dry seasons in life do not last. The spring rains will come again.’ ~ Sarah Ban Breathnach
I’ve been observing myself.
My body. My face. Changing.
I suppose now is my Autumn.
My hair is more grey than brown.
My skin beginning to sag.
The things I used to be able to hide, show more on my face now.
There is occasional sadness in that mirrored image.
A sense of loss of the person I was.
Amongst that, there is also a huge strength that wasn’t there before.
An inner power that I never previously enjoyed.
A sense of peace finally about who I am.
Yes, I look at young girls with a mild envy of all they have before them but also relief that I don’t need to go back and do it all again.
I want to keep going and with a sense of urgency to get better.
Not for anybody else – as it was in the past, but for me.
In my younger years I was shy, afraid even.
Now, despite some regret over things I could have done with more thought and less haste, I am happy in my own skin.
Despite it’s age.
There is truth in my years.
Not just life experience but a rawness.
I can now stand naked in the mirror and my first thought is not what I can change but what I can love more.
How can I surrender and allow more of the inner me to surface.
‘When you think you’ve surrendered, surrender some more.’ – Gabrielle Bernstein
How can I become more fearless than I am?
How can I be more powerful in my presence?
Because I can.
Letting more of myself go – the image I once held in my mind of how I was going to turn out.
Once I do that, another beautiful part of me emerges.
A piece of me I never knew existed, an amazing and more wonderful part.
One that was hiding behind the fear and shyness.
Disappearing behind the ‘need to fit’.
Just stopping to allow myself the time to become is an amazing journey – a gift.
Can you give yourself a gift?
Can more of you emerge if you just stop?
Let go. Release. Love who you are.
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